Uncut
Posted on March 3, 2010
I don’t think I’ve hidden my love of the uncut cock. I love all cock, but probably because stupid Americans often have ideas about circumcision or lack thereof based solely on urban myth or outdated ideas, I feel I should champion the rights of the uncut cock.
I used to be one of those stupid Americans. Well, I still am a stupid American, but not in the area of circumcision. Not any more. I had never seen an uncircumcised penis, and certainly hadn’t played with one, when I would espouse such ignorant ideas about uncut penises being dirty, having smegma, smelling, looking gross, and so on. I was an asshole.
Eventually I fucked a guy who wasn’t circumcised. And another, and another. I realized that so long as the person has good hygiene that there’s nothing more dirty about an uncut cock versus a cut cock. And uncut cocks are easier to give handjobs (though I admittedly lack skills in this area in general). Then I fucked a few more guys who were uncircumcised, and then I married an uncircumcised cock. Oh, I mean I married a man who had an uncircumcised cock.
I have been an anti-circumcision advocate for years. No, not formally, but when the subject came up, and when people said things about uncut cocks being dirty, etc., I felt it my duty to educate the morons. To be fair, most of the people were just ignorant, like I was in my teens. Most of the time I was talking to women, and some men, who had never had relations with a penis in its natural state so I could always win the “it’s not clean” arguments with them.
But the stupidest arguments came from talking to people who said they would circumcise their theoretical future sons. “So his penis looks like his father’s.” How many father-son pairs bandy about their dicks, comparing notes? And how many children don’t take, “That’s the way he is, and that’s the way you are; you are different” explanations from their parents? Contrary to strict Freudians, children aren’t all that obsessed with their parents’ genitalia; they’re more concerned with their own. I saw both my father’s penis and my mother’s muff (and vagina, but that’s a different story) when I was a kid and they both looked very different from what I had going on, which was explained to me by saying they were adults and I was a child.
Parents really need their children to look like them that much? Then why don’t they go ahead and dye their hair, get them those nose jobs, provide them with liposuction? Because kids’ hair tends to be lighter in color than their parents’, their noses cuter and more button-like, and their bodies chubbier.
Or how about the argument that little boys don’t know how to clean themselves properly? Guess what, future parents? You have to teach your children – boys and girls and intersexed – how to clean themselves. Hygiene is important for all children to learn, not just girls because they’re inherently cleaner, which is utter bullshit anyway. If a child can figure out how to clean a vulva including inside the labia majora, then a child can figure out how to clean a penis including underneath the foreskin.
Another lame argument I hear is that the incidence of sexually transmissible infections – HIV being the biggie – and certain forms of cancer are lower not only for the circumcised man, but also for his sexual partners. While it’s laudable for a future parent to be concerned about her son’s health, isn’t it just a little creepy to be that involved in his future sex life? So involved that you’ll cut off a part of his body now – without his consent – to prevent something that may or may not happen in the future? To me that’s about as creepy as getting a preventative double mastectomy for your minor daughter because her aunt had breast cancer.
This last argument – lower incidence of STIs – is supported by our very own Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. However, even the CDC admits that the various studies, especially regarding a much lower transmission of HIV in heterosexual men who were circumcised, were conducted in Sub-Saharan Africa, where education about HIV transmission and prevention is not widespread, where dry sex is commonly practiced, and where unprotected sex with sex workers is the norm. Supposedly the survey of the studies controlled for all these factors, and that may be true, but provided parents raise their Western children (and everyone with whom I had these discussions was Western) properly, none of these things would be true. Well-educated, privileged parents would teach their spoiled children about HIV/AIDS and other STIs, and how to use barrier methods for birth control and disease prevention when having relations with sex workers or anyone else. Chances are the topic of dry sex would not even come up.
Of course I feel like I win each of these arguments with logic. But my trump card is what actual doctors recommend for babies born in the US. The American Academy of Pediatrics: Circumcision Policy Statement begins, “Existing scientific evidence demonstrates potential medical benefits of newborn male circumcision; however, these data arenot sufficient to recommend routine neonatal circumcision.” The AAP policy statement goes on to say that the potential benefits and risks of circumcision should be fully explained to parents, taking into account cultural and religious factors.
This is where I again call bullshit. Really? A man in the sky told people that cutting off part of their sons’ penises would mean they were chosen by Him and therefore special? Maybe special because if they lived through such a procedure – considering the lack of sterilization, medication, etc., thousands of years ago – that would mean they were stronger than the boys who hadn’t had to endure such mutilation. Because we all know there is no man in the sky. And if there were would he really be all that into cock? Wouldn’t he want to fuss with pussies too? Oh, no, because God created man in his image.
So is God circumcised or not?
I swear. True (logical) story.
Tags: foreskin, idiot, manners, yummy cock
Categories: True Story.
Great article. I was circumcised at birth and I am restoring my foreskin. My wife lives my foreskin, even if it is restored. She does not get sore like she used to, and we don’t need lube. Having a foreskin is definitely a win for both of us.
15.03.2010 19:14
At some point in your life, I believe you have encountered something that I seek.
I work for a non-profit that’s trying to end infant circumcision in America through education and advocacy. Part of that job is doing a daily 24-hour blog search for the phrase “circumcision foreskin” and emailing the people who published anti-circ articles to say thank you (and, if they’re willing, link to our homepage). I didn’t do that when I found your article this morning.
I decided I had another request for you, one that I would have felt guilty for posing on on company time: Do you know any single, woman geniuses? At some point in your travels, you must have been to a place where you felt like your kind were drawn. You must have gone to a school or worked at a job or been a member of some club that had a disproportionate concentration of others like you. Can you point me in the direction of one of those? I’m tired of being single and I believe I deserve better. Where do I go?
Oh yeah – and I’m a cut man, so if they’re all the compassionate sort, it would suit…
16.03.2010 21:44
im uncut, and gf definitely likes it better compared to the cut ones shes had. and as shazamsf says, much easier handjobs for her.
16.03.2010 23:20
[...] Uncut » Random Rim Jobs [...]
19.03.2010 20:24
Well you are right about one thing. You are a stupid American.
17.04.2010 18:46
Good for you.
Keep educating the stupid americans.
jonjon
31.08.2010 12:10
[...] will not bother going on another anti-circumcision rant, since you can read my last one, but I’ll just use this lovely photo as a jumping-off [...]
11.11.2010 03:56
Good for you for publishing your account. Good sense results in most British baby boys keeping their foreskin, but I am a man who got mutilated as a baby, but now I’m spending time restoring what I can. Copulating with a dry, rough, penis is no fun with advancing age, both for him and her.
07.12.2010 13:23
Thank you! :) there needs to be more people out there informing people about this, anyone who says YOU are a “stupid American” IS a stupid American. Circumcision DOES NOT prevent HIV/AIDS/STDs, is NOT cleaner, and DOESN’T prevent cervical cancer in their partners. proven facts. Condoms and not sharing bodily fluids prevent HIV/AIDS/STDs from being spread. DUH.
Plus, as you’ve stated, foreskin is GREAT for both males AND their ladies :)
(and i know this because unfortunately my husband was cut when he was a baby, and our sex life has so dramatically suffered from it that sex is not good. i didnt know the reason until i stumbled up on it, but since then have done extensive research on it. anyways, he is restoring!)
GO FORESKINS!!
11.12.2010 19:58
Stupid is not the first word that comes to mind when I reflect on American circumcision: “conformist” and “insecure” are. American parents worry that their son will be a social outcaste if he has a Weird Dick. They think he will be mocked and bullied in the locker room, that he will not do sports to avoid the trauma of being stared at in group showers. They fear that girls will refuse to date him when they discover that his Trouser Snake comes with an eyelid. Hence he will marry later in life a woman who is less than ideal.
I have been told a half-dozen times that intact men never get BJs. I have been told that to expect a man to rinse off his johnson before getting close and personal with a woman is to expect too much. It is evident to me that behind the American obsession with making the penis bald lie a host of unstated urban myths and the like.
God is a woman who designed the penis for sexual comfort, not for looks. The notion that God looks kindly on those of us who have had trimmed the long sleeve on the short arm is absurd on its face. Circumcision is a human custom grounded in bizarre fetishes and a sad ignorance of how Nature intended foreplay and vaginal intercourse to work. Circumcision will die because bold and educated American women are rediscovering how sex and foreplay are supposed to work, and using the internet to share with the world what they have learned. Circucmision is untenable in a world where women are free to experience both cut and uncut before 25 years of age, and blog about it anonymously.
06.02.2011 11:06
I am well past the age of 25 and my blog is hardly anonymous, but otherwise I think you’re correct (except your unnecessary capitalization of certain words).
06.02.2011 14:05
The capitalisations you deem unnecessary are there to enhance my sarcasm.
Age 25. Over the past 40 years it has come to be accepted, often only silently, that when a woman leaves home at the end of high school, she will discover and experiment with her sexuality. We humour this as long as she insists that the men she “tries on for size” use condoms. By age 25, she is expected to settle down and commit to a single partner. The years between 18 and 25 are precisely the period when a woman is allowed to compare and contrast cut and uncut, and the number of women who have made this comparison is set to grow over time. What a woman does in her bedroom between 18 and 24 is not held against her in later life.
11.07.2011 17:15
I don’t think anyone’s sexual exploration – save that that does not involve consent – should be held against him or her, ever.
12.07.2011 19:47
I found your anti-religious paragraph unnecessary and disrespectful
08.09.2011 21:53
I find your opinion irrelevant.
09.09.2011 00:19
The fact that you responded to what I said proved that my opinion is indeed relevant. Nice try.
18.09.2011 21:42
I don’t know who the fuck you are, you anonymous shit.
18.09.2011 22:35