I didn’t know he was Meth Boy right away. Maybe because I’m naive or ignorant or lame, but what I thought at first was that he was an adult child.

He was a spazzy guy who couldn’t stop moving. He always had a skateboard with him.  We met in a bar.  I knew right away I wanted to fuck him but he was with friends.  So we exchanged numbers and parted ways.

Then on Halloween 2009 we got together.  I hate wearing costumes but there he was in a fairly detailed devil mask.  We had a couple of drinks.  He talked about how much he wanted to fuck me.  Great, let’s fuck.

We went to Kinky Salon.  It being Halloween it was packed, but we found a place to lounge in the back room.  There were people sexing it up all around us.  I took off my shirt and then my bra.  I kept on my skirt, but I wasn’t wearing any panties.  We kissed.  He had a nice mouth.  He took off his shirt.  He pulled out his dick.

There it sat, a sad limp thing.  He pulled on it.  A lot.  Nothing happened, though it did appear to be quite flexible.  He told me that he had too much speed.  Yeah, any amount of anything that prevents erections is too much.

We were taking up valuable real estate in the back room of a sex club just chit-chatting since there wasn’t a dick that was useful.  Of course there are other things, but I didn’t have any with me, and I didn’t trust his hands to go near my pussy.  He was sweating a lot and those hands were all over the place, running through his hair, pulling on his clothes, and generally picking up the kind of bacteria that throws the properly balanced pussy environment out of whack.

We left the sex club and went to the Tenderloin so he could get some food.  We finally parted ways well after 3am.

The next day I was planning on going to the California Academy of Sciences as it was free for people in my zip code.  He texted me, claiming he was fully capable of getting his dick hard.  That was nice, but I had plans that did not involve his dick.  He went with me to the museum.

We had a nice time, after which we walked to the Park Chalet where we had a couple of drinks.  It was a nice day so it was packed.  We ended up sitting in the wooded area beyond the Park Chalet’s grassy area.  He told me where he was the night before, after we parted ways:  In a porn booth pulling his pud.

We took the bus back to my house.  My roommates were gone for the evening so we had the place to ourselves.  First was a shower for him.  He had been sweating continuously since the night before and he did not smell nice at all.  Smell is very important to me.

Once out of the shower he smelled good and looked cute and clean.  His dick found its way into my mouth.  But it still wasn’t hard.  We hung out some more.  Then I sucked on his dick some more while we were on the couch.  His cock was starting to get hard.  Yes, finally.

And then my roommates came home.  The roommates grabbed the dog and walked her around the block while we dressed.  So that was that.

I told my friend Ramona about him.  She asked if he seemed surprised that he couldn’t get it up.  No, actually, it seemed par for the course.  She said that’s because that kind of guy can never get it up.  He never had a hard dick.  Ever.  I didn’t want to believe it.  I gave him two more chances.

We saw each other again about a month later.  He came over and crawled in bed with me.  It felt nice but he didn’t even try to fuck me.  I’m pretty sure that’s because his dick wouldn’t get hard.  Then he asked to take a shower.  He had arrived early in the morning and should have showered beforehand.  I was irritated.  Then something came up so I didn’t have the whole day to spend with him, for which I was grateful.

Our final meeting involved drinks and dinner.  But I could tell right away that he was again spazzy.  He couldn’t hold still.  And over a rather tasty dinner it became clear that chances were very high that he would once again not be able to get it up.  I told him I liked him a lot, that his mouth really was lovely, but that I couldn’t handle hanging out with someone who was so much of a mess.  I left him in the restaurant.

He was not my first meth boy, however.  The “adventure” reminded me that a while back I’d been up and horny well into the night.  I resorted to Craig’s List.  I did not think that the most of the other people up at that time were not night people like me but high.  The guy who showed up was very young.  He arrived on his bicycle.  Not a bicycle that most people use for getting around town, but a BMX-style bike for doing tricks and such.  What is it with guys who do meth and their childish modes of transportation?  Anyway, he was most definitely able to get it up.  He had very soft skin, but when he offered to go get me some meth I declined.

I swear.  True story.

Tags: booze, disaster, idiot, manners, SF love, yummy cock

Categories: disaster, True Story.

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One Response

1. Froghole The Klown:

   I hear klowns are always ready for action.
   See you at Bawdy

   05.01.2010 22:10